Hush, baby. Speak softly.

CHANGINA THIS

YOU’RE A MISTAKE I’M WILLING TO MAKE :(

fuckkkkkkkkkkk

Maybe I never really liked “Biebs” in the first place. Maybe he was just a happy crush. Cause if I really did like him, I wouldn’t be this way. It’s like I’m losing my feelings for him. And even before I had my dream about James, it’s already been weird. I’m happy when I’m with him, but when I’m not, it’s like I don’t like him as much. And now, when he texts me sweet stuff, I don’t get thrilled anymore. Sometimes, I don’t even want to text him. I don’t know, really. Weird how one dream about James could change all those weeks with “Biebs.” It must mean something, right?

@ailujdelacruz 2 days and 53 minutes.

@————— May I visit you on your birthday? /:)

@ailujdelacruz

@—————- Yay! :D

@ailujdelacruz Yay!! :))

@—————- HAHAHA! I’ll see you on Wednesday!! >:D<

@ailujdelacruz See you!! >:D<

(via twitter)

Me: I gots the chickensux! :(

Person: NOSHIT. =))))))))) HAHAHAH! Gago, that sucks, man. :))

Me: I know. On my birthday. :(

Person: I fcking know, man! =)))))) We be connecting them dots. :>

First, I had fever and he and Mims wanted to visit me.

Now that I have chickenpox, he still insists to visit.’

“I want to visit you :D:

“I’ve had the pox already so I can visit you!! :D “

“BEWARE OF @ailujdelacruz’s classmate he’s very gross and has the chickensux!”

“Shall we kidnap you? :>”

“Aryt! Time to go to your place!! =))”

“It’s all good :> See you when you get better ;)”

“It’s ayt! :> Me and @camimsy will visit :> Right Mims?!”

“Want pop tarts?! :D”

“What’s your address?! I’ll bring @camimsy :>”

Lets hang! :)) Pangpawala ng lagnat :>”

Okay so when I got home last Wednesday, I put down my stuff and told Ate Nora I’ll go out to get my Eco notebook from my classmate and that I’ll be quick, it won’t even take 10 minutes. But I actually really met up with JLN to get Ejay’s palanca for Arie from him. I thought it was just gonna be quick. He gives me the letter than we leave on go on with our business. But, no. We sat at park the and hung out. He tried to look at my ID, but I kept it in my pocket to prevent him from seeing it. So he just borrowed my phone instead. Then we talked and talked. After awhile, he tried to reach into my pocket to get my ID, so I grabbed his hand to stop him and I stood up. Then he held my hand and pulled me to sit beside him. Closer to him. And we just continued talking.. Then I realized it was getting late and I wasn’t supposed to be out for long. So we said goodbye and we stopped ‘cause we didn’t know if we were supposed to hug or something. So we just did that one arm hug thing. Then we left..

Anyway. now I just can’t stop thinking about it. We used to text a lot. Like, A LOT. I don’t know if he liked me then or if he was just being friendly.. But, yeah I enjoyed having someone to text all the time and some to ask me how my day was and stuff like that. But then one day, he just stopped texting. And I realized that I liked him. But I knew I shouldn’t. After what Jackie and Cams have gone through. So, I got used to us not texting anymore and the feelings went away. But then, a because of last Wednesday, the feelings are back.. And I have so many thoughts and questions in my head. What if he secretly likes me too? What would happen? What should I do? Cams and Jackie will hate me. I know it’s wrong and it was their own fault and I deserve to be happy for once and for the first time, but they’re still my friends.. I really don’t know. HAY. Well that’s just a thought if he DOES like me.

So, yeah. That’s about it.

19August2011 11:13PM